Singles Bar Goers Gifts

"Okay, I'm intrigued."

Check your universal remote control at the door.

Best Before 5th Pint.

"Well, what are you doing after the millennium?"

'No more for me, thanks - I've already had a skinful.'

"She said 'let's go for a walk in the park'. It turned into a quagmire."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

If bar stools were like playground swings...

'What's wrong with him?' - 'He drank a glass of water by mistake.'

"Drinking improves my vodkabulary."

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

"Don't wait too long for Mr. Right or you'll end up with Mr. What's left!"

"If at first you don't succeed, buy me another drink."

Cat Love Ads: "Are you; 'Stubborn, lazy, unfaithful and psychopathic...with no sense of humour?""

Pints of Lager

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

Frog and Princess in Bar

"Do you know what girls want?"

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

Wedding - throw the bouquet and the little black book.

'I promised my wife I was only getting one beer.'

"My body is a temple... unfortunately it's in ruins"

Joe's Bar, Under New Joe!

'I'm thinking the bee beard is the main reson that you're still single'

"I think you two may hit it off. Craig, here, is an attractive male academic in his early forties who seeks a warm, vivacious woman delighting in conversation, arts, and nature for an evolving romantic commitment, possibly marriage, while you, Vivian, are a good-looking, intelligent, stimulating woman in her late thirties who seeks an educated, unattached, well-bred man concerned with ideas, culture, and the environment with whom to share your life interests and companionship."

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

Live soccer today.

Full glass

"Never drink on an empty..." "Pocket?"

'It's dead in here tonight.'

'I can drink beer, wine or liquor. I'm a 'hybrid.''

Mobile phone in bar asking for a pint of beer

Bob's Bar tightens it's belt by reducing happy hour to happy minute.

"I used to think maybe I was the problem but then I realized she was just a bitch."