Simulator Strategist T-Shirts

"If marriage is so great how come you never hear about simulated marriage?"

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

"Quit stalling, Smithers. Where's the SALES chart?"

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

'In the computer simulation he said he admired my candor and gave me a raise.'

"I've never read such utter nonsense! There's a guy here reckons we're all living in some kind of computer simulation!"

Re-Tooling Costs - "Could you be a little more precise than umpteen million?"

Thin Tank and Emote Tank.

"It turns out I just wasted the whole morning networking with a dog."

'I know I can't take it with me, but what about computer simulations?'

"How could you forget where you buried dad. You do know he has the car keys in his pocket?"

Walking To School Simulator

Smoke and Mirrors: Harold couldn't work out why his new store wasn't getting any customers.

Cyberwarfare

'We're in a fantasy team owners' league, we locked out our players and came here to yuck it up.'

The Conservative majority in parliament leaves the Liberal party powerless

'I spent today with out spindoctor, and boy, am I dizzy.'

'This paintball war has really spun out of control.'

"Oh, it's just more white-male stuff."

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

'The Polite Lions' - a new sim game - "We've already got chairs, thank you."

"I've come up with all the right words for our new sales strategy, now we just need to work out what order to put them in!"

"The boss won't be able to make it on time. He asked us to reschedule this meeting to discuss the agenda for our next meeting where we're going to brainstorm strategies to prevent procrastination in the workplace."

Office of Strategic Scenarios: 'Best case...Worst case.'

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

"Come pick me up. This is going nowhere,"

George Smith Patton

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

'Mom's in the bedroom trying on scenarios.'

'One day we'll look back on all this, in a computer game.'

"He'll be fine, he won't even notice we've been gone a fortnight."

'More seltzer, please. This flight simulator program came complete with inedible airline food.'

A jogger being bombarded by tiny battleships in a pond.

"Sorry Dad, capitalism's a bitch."