Silly Gift Seeker T-Shirts

"Must you walk around in your underwear? -- My wife and KIDS are in here, for crying out loud!"

Bald man spraying his head with hairspray

"The following programme contains scenes of a very noisy vacuum cleaner."

God putting the finishing touches to the Pug.

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

Blind man walking a tortoise.

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

Ball as water-melon.

A watch face with Stonehenge

'It's another corporate lawyer...do we want to buy a soul?'

T-Rex Game of Choice - Ping Pong

Where Deviled Eggs come from

Customer entering bank that is touting number of toasters given away

"Waiter, this is the worst meal I've ever tasted. And believe me, I've eaten some crap!"

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

Santa's Helpers

"Roadkill cookies"

"Pass that."

International House of Excrement

Regifts of the Magi

Kid Hints To Santa That He Wants A Bicycle For Christmas

Notorious gangsters, Bunny and Clyde.

"What seems to be the problem?"

'Hey! You're not for real, are you man?'

'Buy two pounds and I'll throw in the sword.'

Fish mobsters.

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."

"I've been really craving Italian food for months now. Can you grab me two kilos of rigatoni, three kilos of fettuccini, and a bigger shell? The one I have is feeling a bit too tight lately."

"I'm glad I don't have to put gas in it. the downside is that it takes a lot of time to put 3,000 AA batteries in it."

"I'll fill it with Play Doh and no one will ever know the difference."

'If you're out and about today don't forget the pith helmet.'

Football heads...

'...You're just not built to take selfies.'

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'