Silly Adults Gifts

'Could I have a look at your childrens menu? It's only my inner child that's hungry!'

"I think the most rewarding part of caring for elderly parents is when they call you because they don't want to bother the 9-1-1 people."

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

Get crazy once in a while

Karataoke

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

Mother threatening to gag her baby.

"Do let me know if I'm getting in the way, won't you?"

Cheap amusement with... THE HAPPY COUPLE!

"I just saw some confused old goat pee all over the bathroom floor." "That was a mirror. And that wasn't the bathroom."

'Male, 38, still living with his parents. They asked us to keep him overnight, so they could change the locks.'

"Professor Zlata! You're just in time to be the planet Neptune!"

'There is a kid at school who can play 'Jingle Bells' with his farts. That is impressive because flatulence is a difficult medium.'

My Folks, dressed up like Eskimos

"Although the estate will be distributed equally, your father wanted you all to know that Keith was his favorite, followed by..."

Peniteniary for the terminally silly.

"We prefer to remember him the way he was, before he passed the bar."

Hazardous substance - ignitable, corrosive, reactive, toxic, real smelly, yucchy.

How the Easter Bunny lets everyone know where the naughty kids live.

'Polly wants a machine gun.'

'It must be a milkfish.'

"Don't complain to your dad about your student loans. He's still paying his off."

"Coco, stop eating your food properly and play with it like your brothers!"

How many calories in a booger?

"I think the lines down!"

"Hey, Siri, is it too late to threaten my parents with running away from home?"

Grandad and grandson sticking out their tongues.

"One day Son all this will be yours."

'Don't worry. We'll fit into these things by spring.'

A Heart to Heart Talk

Bank of Mum and Dad.

"Mom, Dad, this is my therapist, John, whom I've told so much about you."

"You're moving in with us? We were going to move in with you."

STRIP Hambone: Wind up computer

"I'll never forget my father, near death, saying 'get me a pen... I'm going to change my will.' But it was Sunday, and all the stationery stores were closed."