Signed-book Afficionado Gifts

Book signing. 'Who shall I put it to?' 'Ebay, please.'

"Sign my yearbook?"

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

'It's not for myself, you understand."

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

Author of 'The Big Pop-up Book' popping up out of a folding table.

Meet the author - celebrity autobiographies,

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

"Regarding the plot of your novel ... what on earth were you thinking?"

Graffiti artists signs his memoirs in bookshop.

'According to this, you owe $57.32 in late fees for the book 'Getting By on a Shoestring Budget'.'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

Meet the Author

"You'd be angry, too, if your alter ego was a successful physician."

'Do you have this in a smaller size?'

The joy of sects.

"I refuse to answer on the grounds that it may tend to hurt sales of my 'tell-all' book."

Richard Hughes.

Bibliomaniac

What're you doing today, Darlene? Power relaxing. 9 to 10:15 I'm reading the paper. 10:20 to 11:30 I'm getting my nails done while reading Catch 22 for my books club. 11:45 to 1, I'm eating lunch, catching up on calls, paying bills then kicking back on the couch from 1 to 1:15. The afternoon is sheer bliss. Yoga from 2-3, Pilates from 3-4, massage from 4-5, meditation 5-6. Now move. Please now! You're interfering with my relaxing. How the type-A spend their Sundays. 10:02, bathroom break. Everyo

'The most moving part, for me, is when they explain how to fuse the main pipe to the power hose.'

3:00 pm - Meet the author

"Oprah is definite, Barnes and Noble is giving you front windows, and Norman Mailer has agreed to a feud."

The book that will not be denied!

"I read an unforgettable book! Unfortunately, I don't remember the title and the author..."

"Read it again, Daddy!"

"Can any of you draw? I'm thinking we should move into children's books."

Food chain.

Hanging out your shingle

Victor Hugo

"No religious nuts!"

A man sits behind a table in a book store with a sign that reads "Take the author to lunch 1 P.M."

Somewhere In France... Mary Anne experiences that certain 'Je ne sais quoi'