Sight Test Smuggler Gifts

'No cheating'

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."

Can't read 'SLOW'.

'McWit never could build anything level.'

'Nicely done. You may have double-vision, but it's 20-20, 20-20.'

Exportation and importation in Cuba

'Of course I know how to read the water, but I my glasses fell overboard.'

Lost luggage turning up on Mars.

"Just barking will do."

'I said there is a F-I-L-E in the C-A-K-E!'

Sightseeing in the car

"That's against the rules...."

The School's new healthy lunch initiative, with it's ban on junk food, turned out to be very lucrative for Stewart.

'Let's dump the balloons and do a re-weigh.'

"Oh, honey, I love it! A movie theater gift card and a new extra-large purse to sneak in the snacks!"

"Sorry about the grime, Doc. I had to burn some bridges on my way here to keep the crazies from following me."

'You're not trying to smuggle wildlife out of our country, are you?'

'I think I need glasses, I've just given my own car a ticket.'

"Excuse me sir, no pets allowed!"

'Great job! Now cover the other eye.'

"Nope. Nothing to declare."

'I think we've just found the 'big cheese' in the notorious jewellery smuggling ring, Bert!'

'This book changed my life. I stole it.'

"Do you know underground zoos will pay a fortune for black market penguins?"

'For the view I wouldn't come here'

"I understand that you love him like a son, but you have to take him to a vet not a pediatrician."

My parrot died.

Policeman: 'Holy Smokes!'

'Bob couldn't stand rhetorical questions. This was clearly a case of police brutality.'

"Remember, if we sell arms to them, and then they turn on us, they will not agree to return everything to us."