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"It's the deep end."

Don't swallow. I've lost a contact.

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

'Hey, mac, is this your idea of glasnost?'

Mediterranean Martini

Kid see shadow from mom as mom see shadow in painting.

Odds 'n Ends/Odd 'n's

"Don't mind me - finish the gag."

"It can cut through anything ... well, almost anything. There still is governmental red tape."

'My first drink since my accident.'

"You know, Larry, you really don't have to carry that thing around to tell "knock-knock" jokes."

Armadillo playing accordion.

'So much for his new glasses...he didn't see that coming'

"Surprise!"

"It's from my Swiss account."

'True but only in practice, not in principle.'

Underwater campfire.

"Sorry. I'm molting."

Porcupine exiting water has skewered fish.

"Oh my god! I'm not wearing clean underwear."

A woman dips her feet into a pond.

"I can tell you're upset."

A bodiless head sits and eats dinner, while the headless body has a sign which reads 'Out to lunch back at 1:00'

'It's one of those evenings when I just open a can.'

'It was the last time Colin would buy anything on the internet.'

"What' this?! I said to find me a brain!"

'Some gagwriter you turned out to be!'

'That's the worst case of eye strain I have ever seen'

"Science is baffled. I hope you're happy."

'I can't find the 'any' key...'

'On the other hand, I really don't do that much reading.'

"I can't see a thing in here."