Side Effect Enthusiast Gifts

'I think you'll find the side effects of this little drug rather amusing.'

"This medication may cause jitteriness, weird dreams, dry mouth, diarrhea and the Monday blues that lasts a week."

"That new drug causes flatulence."

Network Extending from Buttonhole

'Bring me some more power.'

'It's in case I need a laugh track.'

"36% of our focus group suffered from the side effects, while 14% enjoyed them."

"Honey, come quick! This guy in the comment section just solved the Middle East crisis."

"Would you mind telling me why you keep hitting a scary-music sound bite every time you pick up your steak knife?"

"We may have found the vaccine but it's fattening."

"I can't fire him. He has corporate sponsors!"

'Well, Dear, the doctor did say there could be side effects to those pills!'

"Oh darn, there it is right there: side effects may include squid head."

"Sorry for the delay in fulling your prescription. Since you brought it in there has been two new side effects we have to add to the label."

'You forgot you list of possible side-effects.'

'Apparently it's not enough to say that 'lots of people think we do a jolly good job' anymore.'

'The position carries no salary but does provide for full medical and dental coverage, with three weeks vacation.'

Giant 'NO' with a small man holding a 'Yes',

"I feel cheated. Your medications have much more interesting side effects than mine do."

"this is Justin, our special effects man."

'This container lists only one hundred of the most common side effects. More can be found on the manufacturer's website.'

'The good news is it's not mice.'

'Wait! Tell me again about the 'excessive gas and oily discharge'?'

"Fixed-term contracts, social benefits, pension plans, health insurance. . . we have nothing to complain about. And that's why we're on strike!"

"I may be a big frog in a small pond, but I'm still a damn big frog."

"These drugs won't do much, but the combined side effects are a hoot!"

"Buster's coming out."

'Let me get this straight: The job comes with a full health care package? Including a dental plan? Impressive! What kind of salary are we talking?'

"You'll enjoy the way these interact with over-the-counter medication."

"The tiny one treats the symptoms. The big one treats the side effects."

"On the plus side, by the time you read all the side effects, you'll be done with the medication."

"Any side effects from the HRT?" "WHAT?"

'I'm bored. Want to see whose medications have more side effects?'

'Oh yes. It's mentioned here, under side-effects.'

"Everyone, welcome our new Vice President of Irritating Noises!"