Showroom Wanderer Gifts

Car dealer's sign: If you kick the tires, you've bought it!

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"Mr. Right!"

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"I shop, therefore I am."

bird interprets modern art

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

Scot to a Greek: 'Love your outfit.'

Dynasties - Ping, Ching, Ming.

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

"This is the communications workshop, right? Let’s get started, I’m prepared!"

Art Gallery.

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

"I want that dressing-room mirror fired."

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

"That must be the artist over there."

The sunglasses.

"I'm thinking of leaving these crowded condos and going to a place that's been deserted for years...the mall."

"Well, I have an opening in Cloverdale Mall ... let me hear you say Ho Ho Ho."

"Don't you find her work just so wonderfully liberating!"

"This planet doesn't stand a chance."

Mall Directory: You are here, but your mind is somewhere else.

"It goes from the factory to us in $29,500."

'Why am I not surprised that this section is always the most disorganized?'

'I have one just like this at home. My five year old son painted it.'

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

"I like it here but if Santa doesn't get better WiFi I'm getting a new job."

"As I understand it, he has a whole other workshop in Hong Kong where they make all that electronic stuff."

Man sees book flying in the Mystery section.

'I may not know much about art. But, I don't know what I like either.'

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

'If asked, we should all agree that this seminar never happened.'

'Given the date, they must be organic.'

"Well, he loves people, the birds that fly, the fish that swim, and all the creatures of the forest."