Showbiz Superstar Gifts

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

"So your agent doesn't like your lawyer, and your PlR. people don't like your manager. They all like you."

"I, TikTok."

"Everybody gets a raise."

"Love the bag, Stell! Very career."

'And, for the student with the most hits on his or her Facebook page, the award goes to Lisa Skemley!'

Your granddaughter is studying for SATs. Oh really? Ahem! What did you get on your practice tests? Drool.

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

"Now, is this the kind of painting your Mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

Comedy, Tragedy, Karaoke

Healthy.

'You showbiz types can never make intelligent conversation!'

'Follow the revolution on Facebook, Twitter, Youtube, Blogspot,,,'

"It took a lot of hard work to get here, but it was all worth it in the end."

A dog poops an @ symbol.

"Look, I'm the bobblehead of this team."

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

Rob Brydon.

Leonardo DiCaprio

"Just wait until you read my tweets."

'Your standardized test scores are impressive, but we have no standardized jobs.'

Employee of the Month - male.

Just sitting here kicking field goals (smiley face emoji)

The family tradition lives on: I won the Long Jump and the Triple Jump events...

'Nobody likes me at school. I need a personal assistant, a trainer and a P.R. firm!'

"What's the fun of smelling the Bougainvillea in paradise if I don't smell the envy on Facebook?"

Narcissism Clinic.

'so let me get this straight... you're famous for being the sister of the wife of a man who went to school with someone who knew someone else who is already famous?'

"Would it be possible to change this to something more instagrammable?"

"Thank you for coming into the studio tonight, your story is truly a fascinating one, however I've decided our time would be better spent reviewing my meteoric rise to celebrity status within this television network."

"I have 1,8000 friends on facebook....and you want a college degree?"

"Why do you think I'm spending too much time in front of my computer?"

Touch Gig

'No case law, but we did get 50,000 hits on Youtube.'