Show-off Champion T-Shirts

'You wouldn't listen to me. You have to buy the biggest tree in the lot!'

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

"The medic said he died of an ST-segment-elevated myocardial infarction -- Jack was always a showoff."

And the crowd goes wild—except for Mary, because she wasn't paying attention.

'Selling a stock and marking a profit is better than selling it at a loss, if only for the bragging rights.'

"...and I'm an incredibly flexible gymnast. If you get my drift..."

Skateboard Olympics.

"Because we're jerks."

Dog show success

"If anyone wants me I'll be on the shop floor strutting my stuff."

King of the Swingers.

"I told you Miley's twerking video wasn't going to be pretty!"

'I SAID-what's wrong with a RATTLE like the rest of us?'

"I attended a leadership seminar. They learnt a lot from me."

'You gotta be kidding me!'

Superstar photographs himself making the catch.

'Now that's what I call a trickshot!'

Man uses scissor device with lighter attached to light big cigar.

'I wouldn't read that book, dear...it's only there to impress visitors.'

"Who's he trying to impress? Silly ass!"

"You may not want to read this book but you'll certainly want others to think you've read it."

'I've always been a bit of a ladies' man.'

'Well, when in doubt, I always say, pick the wine that'll impress the hell out of the complete strangers at the next table.'

Golden Violinist

"More like catch, take humiliating photo, and release."

'Go around the park just one more time.'

"Nobody likes a showoff."

'No, I left the price on to impress the neighbours.'