Shopping Spree Strategist T-Shirts

Admit it, you've grown soft from doing all your shopping on the internet. Soft? I'm efficient. In minutes, I can buy more than you can buy in a whole afternoon at the mall. Maybe. But you can't survive the mall. You can't handle the crowds, the decision-making, the impulse-buy situations. You couldn't even handle … Careful. The electronics department! You'd fold. You'd buy the wrong thing and have to exchange it and lack the courage to return to the jungle! You watch your mouth, lady! Anyhow, it

Sockit2u Foot Fashion! We'd like some plain athletic socks. High-cut, low-cut, bootie or quarter socks? White, black, red, blue or striped? New! Nascar. Moisture management, extra-cushioned or abrasion-resistant? Who needs all these choices? The 6-pack of white, water-wicking quarter socks. We have sock soap in mint, spice or seafoam.

"Tom's never been good at managing his word count down....which is why I've got a 363 page shopping list!"

'When it comes to shopping, not only does the buck stop here, but so do the fives, tens, twenties, fifties and hundreds.'

"Your income depresses me, and I shop because I'm depressed. It's a vicious circle."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

"They're on special offer so I got three times more than I could ever use for twice as much as I could afford!"

"I shop, therefore I am."

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

'We don't know what it is but it was in the sale so we thought we'd better get one before they sold out.'

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

"No, we can't get you a new toy every time we go shopping."

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

Holiday Sales: The Starting Line

Shampoo and Salad Dressing.

"I'll throw in a few extra pinstripes."

How would Madam like to pay?

Ladies Fashions - "Money isn't tight - you are!"

'hold the blog - I got a bargain in the sales'

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

'I've got it written down...'

'Man, I've bought heaps on my credit card this month...It always amazes me...How many things I'd rather have than money.'

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"How will you be paying? Crypto, Venmo, electronic fund transfer, credit card, check, cash, precious metals, brightly colored shells or livestock?"

"I guess we'll know ol' Mr. Willis is dead when the Amazon packages stop arriving."

"Halloween stuff already? It's August!"

"Eeny, meeny, miney, mo.."

"I have no idea where we parked the car, or why we exist."

"Let's just get through this first aisle...then we'll discuss your impulse buying."

Shops Shops Shops - 'I've just remembered! We came here to catch a flight!'

"It must be near New Year's Day...There are Easter eggs in the shop windows!"

"It's wonderful, Harry! How late does Neiman-Marcus stay open?"