Shoe Fitter Pillows

'Yes, I have a smaller shoe, do you have a smaller foot?'

'Do you have a size eight that looks like a seven, and feels like a nine?'

'Do these come in blue?'

A women in a shoeshop.

Mister Pretty Shoes

"I stand corrected."

Support Group for high heels abandoned during the pandemic

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

Daniel Day Lewis & George Glasgow

"Do you have a shoe for roaming and prowling?"

'I AM a cowboy so therefore they ARE cowboy boots, OK?'

'They're pinching my toes!'

'Two large ones when you're ready please barkeeper'

"Doctor Scholl and Mr. Hyde."

"I brought my worn out shoes because I heard that confession was good for the sole!"

The Shoemaker's Appendectomy

'I think they make my feet look too small.'

'You got here just in time - These shoes are killing you.'

"These come with a Health and Safety warning..."

'Perhaps madam would try these on? - They look a better fit!'

Trying on boots

Bootmaker upset over the death of a long term customer

'When I was ready to read, they taught me to tie my shoes - when I was ready to tie my shoes, they taught me to read.'

"These are the least elegant one's in stock!"

"I know they're expensive, Evelyn, but like the saying goes...If the Jimmy Choos fit, wear them!"

"I've invented really shiny leather shoes."

'Touching.'

"That's great for the right foot, now let's look for the left."

Arr...Italian it be.

'No, it's not a spit polish. I just really hate your shoes.'