Shepherd Gifts

"As long as it's woolly I don't ask questions."

"The kid's good."

"She's not all over you, but she gets the job done."

"If push comes to shove, I bet you could do some damage with the plowshare."

'It's strange, but ever since that star appeared I've had this overwhelming urge to go shopping.'

"My platform can be summarized in a single word: Leadership!"

Why Are You Following Me?

'Your five years experience herding cats is very impressive.'

"We're giving you our complete cooperation. There's no need to bark at us!"

'There are gonna be some changes around here.'

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

"No, sorry. I couldn't possibly take on another one. I'm short-staffed as it is."

"Hi guys, I'll be herding-from-home-today."

"You can't 'unfollow' me - I'm your shepherd."

Shall we go into the pen? Or stay here and annoy him for another 10 minutes?

'I have no idea how many I have in my flock. Every time I start counting them I fall asleep.'

'I'm sorry but this is a staff meeting and that is obviously a rod...'

Unsure of the correct answer, Teddy looks around and then discreetly pulls out his cheat sheep.

"Oh great... here comes our crazy stalker again."

"The rest of the flock and I feel you're displaying a lack of sensitivity with those 'muttonchops'."

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

Where steel wool comes from.

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

Shepherd looks down in valley to see sheep formed into the shape of the word "BAA".

Sheep dog jumping across sheep - and one of the sheep hits him with a frying pan

"Sheep gave me stress."

Remote control sheepdog

'Still on the fish farms then...?'

"He was much more effective in the field."

"We're good herding dogs, but that drone can't be good for job security."

'Short-staffed?'

'Your dog is worrying my sheep. . .'

Damn!

"We're at the Grand Marina Hotel in Barcelona. Some sheepdog you turned out to be."

Sheep and Sheep Dog on protest.