Shell-strippers T-Shirts

The Stripper

'It must be the dead sea.'

'It's true what they say, you really can hear the sea in these things!'

Try me/try me/try me...

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

Feeling for shells

Tortoise polishing his shell

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

'I hear she melts glass ceilings.'

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

"I can hear the sea boiling."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

'Of course you can hear the ocean,we're standing next to it.'

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

"Do you mind?"

"I've downsized."

"That's his answer to everything!"

"Alright, I'll talk. Just please, stop with the good-cop, ab-cop routine."

"This is it? No video?"

Snail Love.

'Say! You're new here aren't you?'

1930's bather.

"Isn't that your ex wife?"

'OK, so you've considered a whale and never committed. How about adoping a shell?'

Fred gives up his MP3 Player in favor of conch shells.

For Sale By Owner

"I don't get it, everyone talks about 'Working from Home' as if it's something new."

"I come from a musical family."

Tonight he would be a hermit no more.

"My pappy built this shell with his bare claws. I'll be damned if some freeloader moves in."

"I don't recommend extending into the basement."