Shell Enthusiast Gifts

'You're taking too much of that clamshell calcium, Margaret.'

"Shelling doesn't get much better than this, Helen."

"Of course, we just call them 'necks'"

'Boy, you're really into yourself, aren't you?'

'It's always so sad when they repossess.'

Tortoise at mobile home sale.

'I can't wait for the 2012 'Limpets' to begin...!'

'Business must be good.'

"No seriously, I can't sleep on my back: I could die if nobody were there to turn me back upright..."

"I've been evicted."

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

Hey, it's true, you really can hear the sea in these shells!

'It must be the dead sea.'

Try me/try me/try me...

On the brink.

'Tut! Men and their sheds, eh?'

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

"I don't do windows."

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Titanic: How's my steering.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Feeling for shells

"Fow sounds of the Atlantic ocean press 1, for the Pacific ocean press 2..."

"Oh that, that's my holiday home."

'Of course you can hear the ocean,we're standing next to it.'

"How long have you felt like a three-masted schooner?"

Tortoise polishing his shell

"I can hear the sea boiling."

A hard green shell on the outside doesn't always mean it's chocolaty on the inside.

'God knows what he gets up to in there all day.'

"Travellin' through?"

"When are you going to learn to put your shield up when you're flying at tree top level?"

"The shell has a high SPF, but I still need sunscreen for the rest of me."

"That's his answer to everything!"