Shaving Surfer Gifts

'No, that's not my shaving lotion. We've been burning cow chips in the wood stove.'

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

TV-Man

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

They're watching a documentary about safety razors. Sounds like a Schick flick!

Drunk Barber

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

Business man sees himself as a shark

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

You can tell when the blades get dull on your rotary nose-hair clippers.

How I met your mother

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

'...And as suburban sprawl continues to grow, many people are finding themselves living uncomfortably close to their wildlife neighbors.'

'He gets confused switching channels between the World series and NFL games.'

'...you'd better get yourself a good lawyer!'

Remote control wars.

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

"I never saw 'Cheers,' so I won't miss 'Cheers.'"

Don't touch that dial! — We're experts, and we know what you should be watching!

Sex Section in the Library

"We interrupt this rubbish to give you another chance to switch off."

Digital TV presents "It's true there really is a channel for everyone"

'500 channels...surely there must be something worth watching.'

The wetsuit preferred by 9 out of 10 executive windsurfers.

How to Pick up a Safety Razor Blade

'I hope there's something better on the 'other side'!..'

In the shaving cut operating room of a hospital.

Can I ask you a question, man-to-man? Sure, little buddy. What do "man-to-man talks" usually consist of? What? I've never really had one, I don't think. What usually goes into them? Sports? Shaving? Carburetors? A little of this, a little of that. There's a proper ratio, of course. I'm not good at math.

'Whoa,Man!...(Phew!)...Boy,that was a close shave!'