Sewer Safari Pundit Gifts

"This year let's take our vacation at the sewage treatment plant."

"I'm as progressive as they come, except for my money. No one touches my money."

'I use these ice cubes to make minor home repairs.'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

"Don't worry. Mum and Dad think I'm just talking to my invisible friend."

"I wouldn't mind, but I only topped the bloomin' thing up last week!"

"So, it's agreed - we go ahead with the information-matching."

'You drink like a fish.'

'My first drink since my accident.'

'I have a twitter account to slag off my facebook friends and I use facebook to insult my followers on twitter.'

"I can still see the sun, shorty!"

'Not a problem. Our industry is self-regulated. In fact, I'm scheduled to jump off the roof right after this meeting.'

"But plague spreading is all I know?"

"None of this news seems 'fit to print' to me!"

'With the threat of ABS's competing for Council work is going to get even harder...'

"I swear, Eddie, you ought to be on with Bill Moyers."

"I can see the green shoots of recovery. The fag butts are getting longer."

'Happy hour was over an hour ago. Wipe that stupid grin off your face!'

A marooned man builds a swing set from his lone palm tree.

"I know it saved costs but I still think a flyover would have been better."

"I know I should Fuggedaboutit but I can't."

"You'll find a day in the sewage treatment plant will do wonders for you."

Gas Supply To Europe

"He sold his fresh water before it melted."

7 Dead Twits Pub & Alehouse - 'He's paying.'

The perils of texting while stampeding.

"Now remember, act normal!"

Mittzkrieg

Twitter vs Threads

'It sounds like the Zulu Standup Comic tribe is restless tonight! I hear rimshots!'

'What wine goes best with watching well-meaning protesters everywhere getting crushed by powerful governments and interest groups?'

'Dude, see that sign over there? I think I just figured out what it means.'

"We have to re-think this. The old pipeline is sending oil from Alaska to Oklahoma, and the new one is sending it from Oklahoma to Alaska."

'13 Billion for a pipeline extension?'

'Muriel told me that men are all alike - That's kind of reassuring, actually.'