Service Industry Strategist Gifts

"In the interests of fairness, I'm required to disclose that I'm comission driven."

"This is our soft opening."

"I think you should be aware that the chef is a summer intern."

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"He's my cousin. It's just until he can find a new restaurant to work in."

"An actor ... huh, that’s funny, because you look just like a waiter."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

'A tiny kitchen, one cook, and great food...I don't know how they do it.'

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

"Would you like to see a dessert menu or do you not need a little treat after each meal?"

"This robot barista is so authentic it even got my name wrong."

Lunch-Hour Highlights

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"We ran out of the little umbrellas."

'Darling - are you finding these waiters rather over-attentive?'

"Hello, my name is Eddie and I will be your customer tonight."

How to become the perfect waiter. Lesson 83.

'We are not responsible for any coats that might fit a member of staff.'

Outsaucing - A dollop of sauce has been put on a customer's plate from a long arm from afar.

'We're well known for serving only the freshest mineral water, Madame.'

'The wine should be done anytime now.'

'Our compliments to the dishwasher.'

"Allow Me"

We Offer Fast, Friendly Or Quality Service! "So, which one do you want?"

A Menu Board Lists The True Costs Of Lunch

"This one to your liking, sir?"

"Sorry we can no longer supply a free tick removal service."

"I can't take the job in customer relations. I hate the customers. How can I possibly deal with their relatives?"

Food left unattended will be eaten by waiter.

"Can you come by Table Seven? They have some edits for the chicken."

'Waiter, your tip's getting cold.'