Service Industry Sage Gifts

"Can you come by Table Seven? They have some edits for the chicken."

Writer, waiter, writer, waiter.

"We'll have your parts in three days."

"This is our soft opening."

"So, you want me to go all the way back to the kitchen just to get you a menu...? Couldn't I just give you a link to our, online menu?!"

"I think you should be aware that the chef is a summer intern."

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"He's my cousin. It's just until he can find a new restaurant to work in."

"An actor ... huh, that’s funny, because you look just like a waiter."

"Stick to the specials and no one gets hurt."

'Do you think you can turn the company around without making us all dizzy?'

'A tiny kitchen, one cook, and great food...I don't know how they do it.'

"Would you like to see a dessert menu or do you not need a little treat after each meal?"

"Be careful, this plate is… never mind."

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

"You're right, Pierre, they are licking their plates."

"This robot barista is so authentic it even got my name wrong."

Lunch-Hour Highlights

"Don't worry Sir, you're not the first person to ask for a refund and you probably won't be the last!"

I'm only a part-time waiter, I'm really an actor.

"Hello, my name is Eddie and I will be your customer tonight."

"We ran out of the little umbrellas."

'We are not responsible for any coats that might fit a member of staff.'

How to become the perfect waiter. Lesson 83.

Outsaucing - A dollop of sauce has been put on a customer's plate from a long arm from afar.

"I know it's hard to shift gears coming here from your day job as an editor, but the customers don’t like their drinks watered down."

"Allow Me"

We Offer Fast, Friendly Or Quality Service! "So, which one do you want?"

'We're well known for serving only the freshest mineral water, Madame.'

'Our compliments to the dishwasher.'

A Menu Board Lists The True Costs Of Lunch

"Sorry we can no longer supply a free tick removal service."

"I can't take the job in customer relations. I hate the customers. How can I possibly deal with their relatives?"

"This one to your liking, sir?"