Service Engineer Gifts

'The problem's too simple - call someone else'

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

The Computer Bore

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'Anything you can compute I can compute better. I can compute anything better than you.'

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"Quick, Lassie, go get I.T.!"

'It was bound to happen - they're beginning to think like binary computers.'

"You realize there’s probably an app for all this?!"

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

Early Adopter...Early Opt-Outer

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

Artifishial Intelligence

"My mom programmed my toothbrush to follow me until I use it. It's cruel but effective."

"He loves his computer but it's a love that's not returned."

"This is our soft opening."

Algorithm 'n' Blues

Tossing computer into canyon.

Where was I?

Geek fairies

"We need to update your entire operating system."

"Sorry, website closed for lunch."