Service Center Worker Gifts

"The vibration may be a drive shaft problem – or opportunity."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

'Would you like a balloon with that?'

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

"Sorry for the wait, our computers are down. We have to do everything manually."

"Here's something extra to cover his lousy tip. Blame his fifth grade math teacher."

National Living Wage from April 1st.

"I'm working part time, but I'm hoping that once I finish my master's they'll up my hours to full time."

"Did you remember to cancel the scam phone calls?"

"I've worked as a wet-nurse for ten years, but I'm after something new now..."

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

"Please stay on the line – your caul is important to us."

'If you want to hear the ocean, press one.'

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

'I don't want to talk to any flunkies. Put me straight through to the computer.'

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

'Not for what I'm getting paid!'

"You can't say that to a customer!"

'Having a family life and juggling two jobs? Isn't that a contradiction in terms?'

"For a list of the ways artificial intelligence is killing your job, please press one."

'Maybe I should change this thing more often...'

"You gave me the wrong drink. I demand a total refund!!" "OK. Where's the drink?" "What do you mean? I drank it. It wasn't till I was done that I realized it was the wrong drink. The right drink leaves a different aftertaste." "You can't finish the drink and then ask for a refund. That's not how it works." "You didn't tell me that before I paid for the wrong drink. So that's on you." "That's not how it works!"

Pizza Delivery Delays

Stress

"Your call is important to us, but not as important as this delicious cream donut with chocolate sprinkles that I'm about to eat..."

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

"This robot barista is so authentic it even got my name wrong."

'Jack, I'm on a conference call right now.'

'Honey, it's me! If you want to marry me, please press 1!'

'I'm getting tired of these huge phone bills.'

Call centre musicians

"I'm sorry, but I don't make the rules around here. But I'd be happy to connect you with any number of people who think they do!"

'No, I don't want to change my long distance phone company, and,,, Yes, I should have known it was you calling'