Sentimental Story Lovers Pillows

'These days,' she says, 'nothing gets a rise out of him.'

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"Now I think of Mom whenever it's cold."

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

'It must be good chocolate for six bucks a box.'

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

"What did Jesus order?"

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

Alice in Wonderland - The Pig Baby.

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

'This bottle of whisky will give you 'Dutch courage', it's the best I can do.'

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

William Tell

"Can you hurry up with that will? I don't have all day."

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

Fairy tale

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

"He'd make a wonderful main character for a short story, but I wouldn't put up with him for an entire novel."