Sentimental Story Lovers Gifts

'These days,' she says, 'nothing gets a rise out of him.'

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

"Actually, I'm really looking for blessings that aren't in disguise"

'He took from the rich and gave to the poor? It sounds like wealth redistribution.'

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

"Nice epic battle between good and evil!"

"That dream catcher may be working a little too well."

"Now I think of Mom whenever it's cold."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

"I just never 'think I can' anymore."

'I've had the place gob-stopper-dashed.'

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

'It must be good chocolate for six bucks a box.'

Toys were me: lessons learned never growing up

Fyodor Dostoevsky

"What did Jesus order?"

"Now here's a tale that'll make you hair stand on end"

Alice in Wonderland - The Pig Baby.

"Me Tarzan. You CGI."

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

Queen says: 'Mirror, mirror, on the wall ... 'It's all so subjective' is not an acceptable answer.'

"Can you hurry up with that will? I don't have all day."

'This bottle of whisky will give you 'Dutch courage', it's the best I can do.'

William Tell

'And all the executive board members got lovely big payouts and lived happily ever after!'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

"The Ugly Duckling didn't know why he was so attracted to swan culture."

Fairy tale

'So the prince and princess lowered their expectations became savvy consumers, then they lived reasonably contented forever after.'

Rapunzel's short-lived career in the restaurant business.

'What does the tooth fairy do with all those teeth?'