Senior Driver Aficionado Gifts

Old Farts Keep Right.

"I need to tinkle."

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"I'm not old enough to drive yet, but mom says this is good practice."

'God's speed.'

Safe Driving.

Man helping a mini learner driver

Cheesie Rider

I love my motor.

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

"Oh look, that police car is chasing someone! Let me get out of his way. Hmm...he's still behind me. Let me move... That's odd....he's still behind me. I'll move over another lane."

'The penguin is upset...'

'I can't stand to see an animal in pain....'

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

"Lady here wants to put £5 on Cambridge 'Each way'!"

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

The Horse Races

'It's the parents' 4x4x400 metres.'

'Think Basics.'

'The blooming thing took a wrong turn off the course.'

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

'Apparently she looks stunning naked'

'Oh, I'm very fast, but my dad's problem is that I'm not competitive at all...'

"You can turn your blinker off now, Senator."

'Daddy-if we didn't have Mummy how would you know how to drive?'

The horses are off and "Movie Star" take the lead. Here comes "Freight Train" on the rail. Around the bend and down the stretch "Yoge Pose" takes the lead. It might be "Short Circuit" at the wire. No! The winner is "Selfie" in a photo finish!

'Are you sure we're on the right track?'

Doorway for Hats at Ascot

'What, no onion rings?'

Warning, It's raining cats and dogs.

"Now remember if anyone asks... You're the navigator."

The chess pieces that fell off the chequered flag

Tour de France champ Hendrik 'Joop' Zoetemelk

'How did it go at the track today, dear?'

"I have bad knees."