Senior Citizen Socialite Gifts

Church Basement Foodie

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Children's Party

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"Even my chauffeur has a chauffeur."

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

'Relax - we're retired, we don't have any teeth.'

"Whoa! Wrong bar?"

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

"Brian's considering the optics."

'Fill 'er up Fred!'

'Everyone here likes a big band, right?'

'He won't start up on cold mornings.'

A day at the races

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

'Can I get you anything? Coffee? A biscuit?...A lift home?'

"This is the Upper East Side, sir. We don’t sell ‘well’ vodka."

"Imogene is just back from an extended trip through the Navajo country."

'Can anybody here separate their fingers and if so will you pour?'

"I want you two to meet some people who just bought a fabulous five-story brownstone with a garden in Troy, New York."

"Please try not to offer expert analysis."

"Either you're emitting the scent of power, or your phone battery is about to explode."

'Oh, we've met. We were once married to one another.'

"Francophobe meet Francophile."

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

"Your party just totally blew us away."

'Dear, of course no one can tell you what they think of the wine, you haven't told them how much it cost yet.'

Old Geezers Erupting Every Hour on the Hour.

'I like the way you don't say I've had enough.'

'Forget the artwork who made the martinis?!'