Senior Citizen Admirer Pillows

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"I you want to know the age of my nan, just count the rings."

"Wish I could do that." "Better give him a dog treat and a bath first."

"There has been a sharp increase in his cantankerousness."

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

"You want the truth? I can't remember the truth!"

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

Statue fishing.

'170 years old - and they look that age from day one!'

'I still have all my own teeth.'

"He may have a royal flush. He may have a pair of twos. It's impossible to tell since he had Botox."

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"The older I get, the more I change from a lounge lizard into a bathroom lizard..."

Benefactor of children

Pensioners - Old ink Pens at the park sitting and walking

'Let's go upstairs and make love. I can't do both.'

Things You Say When You Are Officially Old - Volume # 2

'Don't talk to me about joint-pain...'

Toxic Relationship

'Watch out for Harold Smedly...He has wandering long-reach pick up tools!..'

"You look amazing Dad. Has Mrs Arnold been ironing your face again?"

Feel good.

Tomb of the Unknown Electrician.

"I have to keep a lot of handwritten notes. Every mental note I make is in invisible ink."

'There's a gastroenterologist in my closet.'

"In retrospect, maybe I shouldn't have called you 'Flash'. It just seems sarcastic now."

'Grandpa, how did you settle things before litigation?'

The day Young MacDonald officially Became Old MacDonald

Remote, Distant, Aloof.

"I'm only attracted to older women."

'The worst thing about getting old is having to your childrens' advice.'

From here to infirmity.

'They say wine improves with age-the older I get the more I like it!'