Senior Citizen Supporter Pillows

'Watch out for Harold Smedly...He has wandering long-reach pick up tools!..'

"Sure I'm depressed - now they got me on this geriatric dog food."

Church Basement Foodie

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"I get it! I get it! Elephants never forget. Now quit bragging about it!"

"We settled into the one-level after our hips got bad."

'Relax - we're retired, we don't have any teeth.'

Introducing Life Alarm for people who have fallen but don't want to get up.

"You want the truth? I can't remember the truth!"

Bed Sores and Breakfast - Palliative care.

'I still have all my own teeth.'

'Ain't it great, Wally, to be over the hill and not under it!'

Old Golfers never die...only those who get in their buggies way!

"He may have a royal flush. He may have a pair of twos. It's impossible to tell since he had Botox."

"Marie, are you still driving?"

"I'm trying to determine if the aches and pains are from an injury or just my new normal."

Charities Fueling Cities

Pensioners - Old ink Pens at the park sitting and walking

Things You Say When You Are Officially Old - Volume # 2

"The older I get, the more I change from a lounge lizard into a bathroom lizard..."

'Don't talk to me about joint-pain...'

'Your mother has finally found a home she wants us to put her in...ours.'

Piss Bull

"You look amazing Dad. Has Mrs Arnold been ironing your face again?"

'He's our new Geriatric specialist!'

"The best part of my days are photobombing at the retirement homes."

When Animals Grow Old...

"If I were you I'd talk to him again later after he's had his nap."

"The secret to longevity is good genes, good diet, a good lawyer and witnesses with weak eyesight and poor memories."