Self-talk Whisperer Gifts

"I need a good pair of inner voice-cancelling headphones."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

"So, what does everyone think of XX81's suggestion for increased funding into AI research?"

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

My other cello is a Stradivari

"Your feelings may be artificial, but that doesn't mean they're not real."

Violin Practise

"When you say you're behind me 100%, do you mean base ten or binary?"

Man and Machine snoozing

Computer help.

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"They don't appear to want to take over. They just want to dance."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

Turing Test Today

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

"I don't know - the minute I figured out how to make it self-aware it realized it was naked, ran, and hid from me."

"Can you help me? I'm having a little trouble working the shredder."

"I said, the brewery has rather overdone the ambiance in here..."

Happy Violinist

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

'Sure I talk to myself. It's the only way I can have an intelligent conversation round here.'

"No more nuts and bolts for you!"

'It's not working because it claims it can think and has decided not to.'

'Oh great, a machine with an attitude.'

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

'If it wants to dream, we could give it some vague, unstructured problem to mull over during the night.'

'It's my job to be nosy!'

Freudian vs Behavior therapist.

Cello player has an audience of cats.

'Hold it, you can cancel that STAT call.'

"I moved out here for peace and quiet, but now I keep talking to myself."

"When I said 'do everything for me,' I didn't mean drink my beer and eat my pizza."

"Vous voyez quoi pour l'avenir de l'humanité?"