Self-control Warrior Pillows

'I don't have a shortage of willpower. I have an excess of fairness.'

Woman looking into a mirror

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

"I did seize the day. But then it seized me right back and used some kind of jujitsu move to flip me on my ass."

"Who cares what little kids think? What's important is that you believe in yourself."

"May I remind you that my core worth as a human being remains constant, and isn't tied to external validation."

"My fuse about my height is about as short as I am."

'What kind of quack is he? No pills, no special diets! He just believes in will power!'

'You know full well, your gastric band won't work if you keep eating spaghetti like that!'

"Dear, it's a well known fact that women's clothes shrink in the closet during winter!"

'I'm afraid my husband will stop loving me as I get older.' - 'Mine would never do that with me. You know why, don't you. He's an antique dealer.'

'Food has replaced sex in my life. Now I can't even get into my own pants.'

'The nicotine patch should get you off the nicotine gum.'

"I'm here to warn you, do not eat both slices of cake – you're going to want one tomorrow."

'I've decided to give up giving up!'

"I can do this all day, marshmallow. I have a bright life ahead of me. You, on the other hand... I'm not so sure."

"Sealed for your diets protection."

In these hard economic times, positive self worth trumps negative self worth.

Vote

"My left buttock is noticeable larger than my right and my dog is missing his hind legs."

"Wearing this hot metal for 20 days straight is rough."

'Worry kills more people than work.'

"Why do I let everybody walk all over me?'

"I hear that women's brains are more active in the area involving self control."

"Don't worry, she's still alcohol aware."

Fighting With Yourself

'A second opinion? -- Are you trying to mess with my self-esteem?'

'To help me stay on my diet, I've hired a portion control officer.'

'Ohhh,a test of willpower eh?? YOU'RE ON!!'

"How's the diet going?"

"Maybe you should ask yourself why you're inviting all this duck hunting into your life right now."

'It's ten o'clock. Do you know where your willpower is?'