Seeking Second Opinion Gifts

'Now this quack wants me to see a specialist- what the hell is a PATHOLOGIST'

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

'Come on, you can make it work! You're supposed to be Lovebirds after all...'

"Get another opinion if you wish, Mr. Von Flip...But I'm confident it will still come up ' heads - we operate.'"

'Where you went wrong' Desk.

'I'm prescribing a laxative pill and a sleeping pill. Never, never take them together.'

"I'm a doctor - I'm SUPPOSED to be a health nut!"

'Learn to relax and don't bottle yourself up.'

"Well, Mr Eagle, coming to see me is the first positive step to get you to soar again..."

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

'You have to give up this devil-may-care fattitude.'

'I recommend a second opinion so the HMO won't second guess me.'

'You're free to get a second opinion, but it looks like something's wrong with that green thingie by your liver.'

'I'm going to check with my pastor to see what the Bible says about this operation.'

"I feel like he doesn't respect me."

'The best thing for you, is to give up booze and smoking.'

'Well, if you don't smoke or drink, stop chewing gum!'

Second Opinion

"We even tried cyber sex, but the line was always busy."

"I suggest you take these pills on an empty stomach."

"Interesting diagnosis. Now let's ask Google for a second opinion, shall we?"

'I want to lose weight, Doctor.' - 'Eat less, then.' - 'I need it to be more complicated than that.' - 'Why?' - 'How can I justify failing if it's that simple, eh?!' - 'Gah. He's breaking me...' -

'Have your daily bread every other day.'

I'He used to star in porno films. Now he can only get aroused if he has an audience.'

"Don't eat anything fatty...you're not listening, Fatty...I said, 'Don't eat anything!'"

'It's my husband, Doctor. He makes me sick!'

"After giving advice for decades, my doctor gave me some. He suggested I quit sitting all day."

'Well you can tell Dr. Zimler that you don't have Dalnik's syndrome, and, in fact, I think you have Zimler's syndrome.'

'If I do decide to get a second opinion, can I get it at your blog?'