Secret Vacation Planner Gifts

"...but if it's a business trip why are you taking your fly pole?"

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'Next year I'm hiring a tank!'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'Are we broke yet?'

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

'We would like an unspoiled paradise, but with lots of shops.'

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

"The best beaches are Santa Cruz, Hossegor, Ericeira, The Gold Coast, Barbados, Sennen Cove, Oahu and Bali son: They're full of surfers..."

"Honey, can you read through our list and let me know if I forgot anything?"

I travelled to get away from it all. All I got away from was my luggage.

"For the last time, we never need the route with the fewest turns."

'We've only got a couple of days to finish this box of cereal. Mom'll never let us eat something called energy-packed after school's out.'

Travelogue

Excess Baggage: Airlines are constantly working on new seating configurations.

"Actually, I hear my boss. I'm on a working vacation."

A couple looks at posters of Rio, Paris and Tokyo, all of which feature skyscrapers.

Canada's winter survival kit.

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

"Sorry, you can't cash in your vacation time. Since you didn't use it, tell it Bon Voyage!"

Vacation Time: Hither, Thither, Yon.

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

"If we'd gone South for the winter, we'd be back by now."

'Margaret, what are we doing on this cruise ship that we couldn't have done at home, cheaper?'