Secret Santa Strategist Pillows

'Let's see what Santa has in his sack for a little boy or girl...'

"Friday, YOU were my Secret Santa?"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

"Dave, quick word about religious symbols in the workplace..."

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

'Tom will coordinate our pre-holiday point-of-purchase displays and Mark will coordinate our post holiday point-of-return displays.'

Santa knows he has to be more careful. One more accident due to pilot error, and the FAA would take away his pilot's license for good.

"Just as I feared. Tariffs."

Man with desk wrapped as a Christmas present.

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

'Sorry I'm not at the meeting, sir

"Let's say an immediate $10.00 allowance increase plus an annual 8% cost of living raise and I'll call him off."

"I'm not lazy. I'm resting before I get tired."

Al, The Go-From Guy

"Until you're top management, Warrick, I strongly suggest you stay within the lines."

Nutcracker Desk Organizers

"Any yet he's always on my case."

'I mind my mother, and I do my lessons, and I'm here for the quid pro quo.'

"Yes, it's snowing in my office. Corporate feels utilities, like heat, are a luxury."

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"

'Now that we all agree on the agenda, a show of hands on how many want to keep it hidden.'

"I'm looking for something that the recipient will be too embarrassed to regift."

". . . and then I realize everybody in the room has their phones set to 'ignore.'"

'Sure, I'll take a meeting - but only if you've been very, very good,'

Security Dept. Keep. Out.

Santa's Workshop: Moved to China

"Whoes jumping? My secretary enforces a strict 'No Smoking' policy"

Christmas escape plan

Ever vigilant, the restive Claus uses it to get an early start on the naughty and nice list.

Guy in center cubicle spying on others.

"Where does it say anything about an age limit?"

'Does Santa have skype?. . . I'd like to get in some face time, so he puts me at the top of his list come December. . .'