Secret Life Enthusiast Gifts

Gigolo Diary

Was the Illuminati - now the Illuminasty

"Mi chiamano Mimi, il perche non so. Sola, mi fo il pranzo da me stessa."

The Vatican's undercover mission to Antarctica, and some endangered penguins.

Company Ink.

"Your covers been blown 007....you'll have to be called 008 from now on."

Happy-Go-Lucky-Father-Of-Two-Avid-Golfer-Longtime-Magnetic-Tape-Salesman-Kiwanis-Member or Thomas Pynchon?

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

"That? - oh my husband - a closet bricklayer."

A bear reads 'Eat Poop Sleep' on the beach

'This tape will self destruct in 5 seconds. If it doesn't, please stomp on it a few times.'

Bachelors talking about fashionable life versus marriage

Psst! Stay in character!

"I like how you keep things simple."

"Cross the road and you are one of us brother, but you can never reveal WHY you did it!"

'This where the meeting for the order of the salmon bowl is?

'You have to send in $5 for a decoder ring to decipher the list of ingredients.'

'Is that some kind of ceremonial mask?'

'Every friend is a potential security breach.'

"That's right, Mr. Jenkins, we rejected your membership application because you wrote your name on it..."

'I see you've created an online altar ego.'

"Of course I could tell you more about the job...but then I would have to kill you!"

"So, this is Becky. She's single and she's totally your type."

The Ekert Saga: '...The Ekert Presahvation league has guarded this secret fah ovah a thousand years, so you can't tell anyone!'

I Was Married to Banksy.

'Did he just flip me the feeding fish?'

Valerie thrived in an internet community that had no idea she was a chicken...

"Rule #1: DON'T talk about sore throat club!"

'Well Knuckles - All those years of faithful service and we never discussed retirement options!'

The secret world of Stephen Harper...

"What do you hear from Agent X-37, chief?", "He's doing fine, but please use his code name 'Kemosabe.'"

"In the old days, being a sheep-dog was easy Son: Now, I have to do a roll-call twice a day and fill in timesheets..."