Secret Documents Enthusiast T-Shirts

Watergate is just the tip of the iceberg phobia. 'I have here secret government documents that describe the events leading up to Custer's Last Stand.'

"Pssst! Do you have anything on American history?"

"The arms reduction talks are off to a good start -so far, we've agreed to ban pebbles."

Was the Illuminati - now the Illuminasty

Private Viewing

Sign on Secret Service door: Could be out to lunch.

'Don't you ever get tired of all the whispering?'

Top Secret Files

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

"Here is the one pager we all agreed on..."

'So much for the will! Now, before you start celebrating, I suggest you think about inheritance taxes, because, according to my calculations, you will be left with. . ."

"Is it my imagination, or does our use of correction fluid increase as people's teeth get whiter?"

Happy-Go-Lucky-Father-Of-Two-Avid-Golfer-Longtime-Magnetic-Tape-Salesman-Kiwanis-Member or Thomas Pynchon?

Files of Doom

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

"Here's a juicy bit of gossip for you!"

'I'm a good listener since I'm always wearing a wire.'

Lawyer to lady: 'Since I specialize in eye injuries, I've eliminated all the fine print.'

Area 51 Shaed of Gray - No Trespassing

"I can't understand how it got lost - I haven't filed it yet"

'I'm sorry sir. I'm afraid you can't see the menu. It's top secret.'

'Farkleson, you need a vacation — you've been lurking too hard.'

"Mr Yomp is in a big hurry, so give him 'speedy runaround number 39'..."

'Is that some kind of ceremonial mask?'

'Every friend is a potential security breach.'

'I have here secret government documents that describe the events leading up to Custer's Last Stand.'

"Five Guys in Witness Protection."

Man marks documents as 'Illegal', 'Sweet Spot' and 'Legal'.