Secondhand Sleuth T-Shirts

"Well sold all OUR junk - he bought all this new junk off the table next door."

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

$1: Family Secrets

'It's not for myself, you understand."

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

"I'm a brilliant stalker and love photography, so I thought: why not?"

Optician and the PI.

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

"Let me through... I’m an armchair detective!"

'Excellent sir! Your signature is now completely illegible.'

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

Two men converse secretively

Exportation and importation in Cuba

"There's another one! Pull over!"

'This assignment calls for a chicken.'

Catholic Priest Gay Mardi Gras

"This was no accident, Sarge! He was intentionally DROPPED!"

'I let Facebook and My-Space do most of the leg work. I just park outside houses wearing a trilby.'

Sherlock Holmes.

"We haven't been able to pick up his trail. We think he's using invisible ink."

Auditing

"You may not like what I've dug out, but you did ask me to snoop into your husband!"

'- but I didn't think it meant a two-made-into one-suit, dammit!'

One of the pyramids of giza has had its top stolen!

Detective follows footprints leading to a pair of shoes.

"I think it was done with mirrors."

"I'm looking for justice."

Julian Assange

'I am the 'fly on the wall' you speak of. What would you like to know?'

"I got them at a car boot sale."

'The killer should not be hard to find - he has left a trail of inserts.'

'Bargain basement sale ... Everything's down but the prices.'

"I won't be needed a new laptop as stated in my email. I've found one on top of my Mum's wardrobe."