Scouting Sleuth T-Shirts

"It's the latest in backpacking supplies. Just add water!"

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Paranormal A-Z...

Joan Hickson

"Look, Professor - a stegosaurus!"

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

He looks so natural lying there...

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

'The police is looking for a teenager who reads books... I bet they'll never solve this case!'

"I'm a brilliant stalker and love photography, so I thought: why not?"

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

The Modern Godot

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

Uncle Sam is Big Brother.

'Okay - Let's crash that bad boy.'

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

"Do you see the one who possessed your soul?"

Lost Property - Missing Head

"Let me through... I’m an armchair detective!"

Optician and the PI.

"Light at the end of the tunnel!"

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

Scarecrow.

"...He appears to have stepped away from his body."

"Hi everyone, thanks for channeling in to help me with my ancestry project."

'This assignment calls for a chicken.'

'Remember, all these security cameras are for YOUR protection...otherwise, I'd come over there and smack you.'

'Well Mrs. Henson, form the looks of this place, egg stacking, children claw marks, chicken blood graffiti, egg splat everywhere, I'd have to say this is the work of a poultry geist!'

F.B.I. An equal opportunity phone tapper without regard to race, sex, or national origin.

...and I see the catering is sorted.