Secondhand Sleuth Gifts

"Well sold all OUR junk - he bought all this new junk off the table next door."

That's supposed to say garage sale!

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

$1: Family Secrets

'It's not for myself, you understand."

'And I want that end table for $40...' When bargain hunters crack.

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

"I'm a brilliant stalker and love photography, so I thought: why not?"

Optician and the PI.

"Let me through... I’m an armchair detective!"

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

'Excellent sir! Your signature is now completely illegible.'

'Loose lips sink principalships.'

Two men converse secretively

"There's another one! Pull over!"

Exportation and importation in Cuba

'This assignment calls for a chicken.'

Catholic Priest Gay Mardi Gras

"This was no accident, Sarge! He was intentionally DROPPED!"

"We haven't been able to pick up his trail. We think he's using invisible ink."

Sherlock Holmes.

Auditing

'- but I didn't think it meant a two-made-into one-suit, dammit!'

One of the pyramids of giza has had its top stolen!

"You may not like what I've dug out, but you did ask me to snoop into your husband!"

Detective follows footprints leading to a pair of shoes.

"I think it was done with mirrors."

"I'm looking for justice."

"I got them at a car boot sale."

'I am the 'fly on the wall' you speak of. What would you like to know?'

"I won't be needed a new laptop as stated in my email. I've found one on top of my Mum's wardrobe."

'The killer should not be hard to find - he has left a trail of inserts.'

'Bargain basement sale ... Everything's down but the prices.'

"Just as we suspected, he's running a dummy company"