Seasonal Preparer Gifts

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"Now, I'm ready for summer."

Squirrels Stockpiling Mulling Spices for Winter

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

Fall on a desert island

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

Easter Egg Delivery

'Actually, I was thinking more in terms of a temporary position.'

'Oh that's weird! i just had a shiver go down my wallet. My wife must have just bought something.'

"Oh, as long as he needs you, Santa's a great guy. But once things slow down and he wants a little vacation time with Mrs. C., it's 'goodbye North Pole, hello crappy temp job!'"

People of the Fall

'I'm writing my New Year's resolutions.' - 'I resolve to finish everything that I start.'

'Since you only work one night a year, it will take centuries to build up your retirement account.'

"Did no one tell you that at this time of year everybody flies south?"

"Take a shower first. You smell like a chimney."

"I'll see your two and raise you three."

"Oh, how I love the change of seasons! From cold and flu to spring allergies!"

"Each year John has so much trouble untangling the lights, they're on him longer than the tree!"

'I'm looking for something, like, 364 days a year.'

"Fuel poverty is not the same as being too mean to switch the heating on...."

"How can I word this Christmas card to my boss without wishing him a merry Christmas?"

Vernal Pond: Here today. . . gone tomorrow.

"Finally! An iconic advertising image that represents Christmas, Valentine's Day and Easter!"

Spring/Summer/Winter

Santa Claus Always Delivers

'First snowdrop.'

4 seasons globe

Rudolph is at bar speaking to a patron-'So he asks me if I'll pull his sleigh and I'm like-'Not until I get that backpay you owe me fatso!' '

Who's ready for pumpkin spice season?

The corner that Spring's around

Easter Bunny HQ. United States. If all these states can move up their primaries, why can't I move Easter ahead of Valentine's Day?!

"The nice thing about school is it makes you appreciate summer more."

"This is the time of year I begin to crave the first Robin of spring."

God's Kitchen

"But, can he support you on what a store santa makes working one month a year?"