Seance Specialist Gifts

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

Get out of the way, Harold - I'm trying to talk to Cuddles.

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

Office Park

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

"Did you have a cat?"

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

"The only thing I'm sensing is an entrepreneurial spirit."

"You're on mute."

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

Clerical Training Course - 'Gentlemen, we are here to practise what we preach.'

'To everything there is a season; a time to cut, and a time to paste...'

"I have eight spirits coming through."

'I hope this is not a reflection on the staff, but the management has asked me to dumb it down.'

'The spirit of Miss Tiger Lilly couldn't come this week!'

Argh, typical! I always think of a terrifying thing to say after the s

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

"I meant 'go and make disciples' after the sermon, Bob."

"He says that it's really not that bad down there."

Seance: That line is currently busy...would you care to keep holding?

"This cozy area between the smog and the sea is quite livable."

"An 'eight' for technical merit, Pastor, but only a 'five' for originality."

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

S

"I've got a patient who needs to chat to someone...Have you got anyone who's completed the 'verbal communications with patients in personal, supportive but not disempowering course?"

Vet checks fish's heartbeat with a stethoscope through fish bowl.

Pastor Joe never works blue: 'I avoid the sex and violence of the Old Testament.'

'Milton, you really did make it to the other side!'

'In two meters turn left!'

Magnifying glass on Oculist's sign.

'You only caught one?'

"Thanks for coming, Olga - I want you to help me contact my husband."