Seance Specialist Gifts

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

Ducks and hares taken in by a wolf at a seance

'F-E-E-D-T-H-E-D-O-G . . . Hey that's spooky! Why would your granddad say that?'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

Office Park

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

"He says he's been sending you messages from beyond the grave but it's possible they're going straight into your junk folder."

"Did you have a cat?"

"The only thing I'm sensing is an entrepreneurial spirit."

"You're on mute."

The response of a spirit during a seance is in fact an annoyed neighbour.

"I'm sensing an awkward presence."

Clerical Training Course - 'Gentlemen, we are here to practise what we preach.'

"I meant 'go and make disciples' after the sermon, Bob."

'Didn't I tell you to take up some hobby other than opera?'

'I hope this is not a reflection on the staff, but the management has asked me to dumb it down.'

"I have eight spirits coming through."

'To everything there is a season; a time to cut, and a time to paste...'

'The spirit of Miss Tiger Lilly couldn't come this week!'

"This cozy area between the smog and the sea is quite livable."

"He says that it's really not that bad down there."

"An 'eight' for technical merit, Pastor, but only a 'five' for originality."

Seance: That line is currently busy...would you care to keep holding?

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'

Magnifying glass on Oculist's sign.

Pastor Joe never works blue: 'I avoid the sex and violence of the Old Testament.'

"Thanks for coming, Olga - I want you to help me contact my husband."

'You only caught one?'

"I've got a patient who needs to chat to someone...Have you got anyone who's completed the 'verbal communications with patients in personal, supportive but not disempowering course?"

'Milton, you really did make it to the other side!'

Vet checks fish's heartbeat with a stethoscope through fish bowl.

'In two meters turn left!'

Henry proudly models his new goggles that prevent him from losing a contact lens.