Sealife Gifts

The remarkably versatile Swiss Army shark, one of the true wonders of evolution.

"Your 'Low On Ink' light is lit."

Aquarium breakout

"Look, I'm very sorry Judy but I really feel I need a new porpoise in life."

'Have a good day at School Dad... See you tonight...'

Sid the squid was an expert escapologist!

'I've just caught your son looking up prawn on the internet again'

Aquarium

'Actually, a broken arm is not such a big handicap for me...'

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

Lazy Octopus

"Sorry mum, but I just don't get the decimal system..."

"I don't do windows."

"Well, if you didn't do anything in North Korea, then why do they keep launching missiles at us?"

'You've changed since we got married.'

'Oh my! He finally proposed!'

'Make up your mind, pal - there are plenty of other fish who'd give their gills for this job.'

Whale Shark Thoughts...

'Oi! You threw that on Porpoise!'

Dolphin

"Tempting, but I'm on a plastic cleanse this week."

Shark food pyramid.

'We have a tour every hour, on the hour, Sir...'

'...and another thing - why do I always have to sleep in the wet spot?'

'…and I want you to limit yourself to 3 feeding frenzies a day.'

"Uh-Oh, gotta go lads. . . I smell blood!"

Octopus with hand puppets performing play underwater.

"Mum, Mum, the choir master taught us to yodel today! I loved it, I want to practice every day..."

'Where are those nice blue fish that we like - the ones with the blue stripes?' - 'We ate them all - they're now extinct.'

"I do lover a good prawn film!"

"So far so good, Bill's reverse psychology was working: no contenders had challenged him..."

"The cultural appropriation is annoying but the herring is delicious."

When blue bottles cuddle...

Octopus gets tickled pink

"They fired me...but how was I to know that human businesses don't hunt and eat their clients??"