Seal Sanctuary Resident Gifts

Successful in ending the seal hunt, Senator Mac Harb is abducted by a grateful herd and spirited away to a small island.

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

'It's almost as if they knew!'

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

'Freedom is nice, but I miss the Circus for the applause and the three square meals a day...'

James decided to stay in that night.

Too many of my babies became coats, so I decided to increase security...

Tiny air ship flying over globe.

'I will never cease to be amazed at how deftly she balances the demands of career and family.'

"It's not a moustache kiddo: It's nasal hair..."

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

"She said yes! She's the seal of approval!"

"It's called a "sanctuary": they fixed my broken wing, took care of me for a few weeks, then released me. Amazing..."

"So far so good, Bill's reverse psychology was working: no contenders had challenged him..."

Official Seal

'Our worship space is quite large, Roger, but sanctuary committee will do nicely.'

Save our seals - "I doubt my little vote will make any difference."

"The cultural appropriation is annoying but the herring is delicious."

Seals on Wheels

'Mike has had a lifelong dream of working at Sea World.'

'It's that bloody David Attenborough! It looks like one of us is about to die a gruesome, yet visually stunning death.'

Noah of the sock world...

'OVERSLEPT? All four thousand of them???'

Sinking Oil Tanker

"I'm not getting out of bed. What's the point? Things keep getting worse every day. Even my toothbrush depresses me... I'll just continue sleeping until the world comes to its senses." "Amen."

'No matter how many times I beat these guys they still don't take me serious.'

"I take it back: You might look at bit clumsy on land, but boy you're amazingly agile in the water!"

"Don't worry, I never get the jokes either, but if you clap your flippers, he'll throw you a fish..."

Animal Crackers. What a mess! I have to check them all. The box says "Do not eat if seal broken" --- Does this look like a seal to you?

"It's elephants who never forget. Elephant seals forget all the time."