Seal Lover Gifts

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

"I always get anxious in large groups."

"Don't crowd me, baby."

"It's not a moustache kiddo: It's nasal hair..."

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

'The ice is quite thin this evening.'

'Sorry, we're full...'

"It's all very well they feed us fish when we work, but what about contributions to a retirement fund?"

Official Seal

"This is Howard, we met at whelkaholics."

Bite out of fishing pier.

'Stop complaining woman, you wanted a boating holiday!'

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

"I said slime."

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Pirate

Waiting for a turn to swim.

'I'll never let my love of fishing come between us.'

"You may enjoy swimming with the dolphins, Howard, but do they enjoy swimming with you?"

'Freedom is nice, but I miss the Circus for the applause and the three square meals a day...'

Too many of my babies became coats, so I decided to increase security...

'Clem,the doctor told you to get away and relax.'

'Alex - I didn't know you freckled.'

Dog brings diver flippers.

'Did you say psst?.'

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

Older woman explains how to see off men with one of her looks

"So tell me, exactly when do you think the Greenland ice cap will start to melt?"

How oysters get engaged.

The Imperfect Storm

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

'This is definitely not your typical beaching.'

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."