Seal Enthusiast Gifts

Blind eskimo being guided by a seal.

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

"OK, before we start fighting, I'm warning you: five of the females are nasty, three snore, six are lazy and pretty much all of them are bad mothers..."

'Fancy going clubbing tonight?'

'... You jump through hoops, and balance a ball on your nose, and all they pay you is one fish?... Boy, do you have a lousy agent!'

"My promotion case went through: I'll get two fish per trick now..."

Sir Paul McCartney scolds Canadian Prime Minister over allowing seal hunt to continue.

"I don't care how quickly it gets them to bed, I still don't like it."

'Sunning ourselves works alright, but nothing beats a good fire to really warm you up...'

'Which colony do you belong to buddy?'

Seal hunting.

"You see, by using a bowling-ball, we practice our balance as well as doing weight-training..."

"Bobby, you may have worked for a circus but that's not an excuse for playing with your food!"

"How dare you challenge our daddy?! You sir, are a bully, and we stand against bullying around here!"

Loose seal

"How is it fair? We do more shows on weekends and school holidays but get no extra fish in compensation!"

"Hey, stop that! You're not fighting fair: no tickling!"

"Seriously? You want to challenge me now? Can't you at least wait until I've finished my morning coffee and today's newspaper?"

"I'm sorry sir, but the next available time slot for a mating fight is Thursday morning at ten..."

"I can't fight you now: the ladies are all out having fun and I'm babysitting..."

Balancing a cheque book

Surreal Madrid

"Honk once for yes and twice for no."

U.S. Navy Seals Breeding Ground.

Ok, I know a sarcastic slow clap when I hear one.

"If I give you a look, introduce yourself. I can't remember their names."

'I'm so jealous: I would love to have a nose like that...'

'I spend my summers at the beach too, as well as my winters, springs and autumns...'

'I don't care how cozy it is... Get up!'

'And this beauty just came on the market.'

'I'm not fat. . . I'm big blubbered.'

The destiny of untrained seals.

'Practical joke amongst elephant-seals.'

'Mum, they're making fun of me at school because I have a small nose...'

A seal is riding atop a great white shark!