Seal Lovers Gifts

"Why on earth do you brush your teeth? A fishy-breath is so much nicer than a minty-breath..."

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

Next year, we are NOT going to Costco.

'Freedom is nice, but I miss the Circus for the applause and the three square meals a day...'

I just trained with my two sparring partners over there. A "boxed set"!

Too many of my babies became coats, so I decided to increase security...

"It's not a moustache kiddo: It's nasal hair..."

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

A seal is riding atop a great white shark!

"So far so good, Bill's reverse psychology was working: no contenders had challenged him..."

Official Seal

"She said yes! She's the seal of approval!"

"You're overprotective. Stop telling her not to go out on a limb."

"That's his answer to everything!"

'SAME SOCKS BAR.'

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

Save our seals - "I doubt my little vote will make any difference."

"The cultural appropriation is annoying but the herring is delicious."

Seals on Wheels

'He runs a very successful hedge fund.'

'Mike has had a lifelong dream of working at Sea World.'

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

'It's that bloody David Attenborough! It looks like one of us is about to die a gruesome, yet visually stunning death.'

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

'No matter how many times I beat these guys they still don't take me serious.'

"I take it back: You might look at bit clumsy on land, but boy you're amazingly agile in the water!"

Squirrels eating different types of nuts.

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

"Don't worry, I never get the jokes either, but if you clap your flippers, he'll throw you a fish..."

'Too much hazel, not enough nut.'