Seal Lovers Gifts

"Why on earth do you brush your teeth? A fishy-breath is so much nicer than a minty-breath..."

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

Coming Soon! More Stuff You Could Live Without!

'Freedom is nice, but I miss the Circus for the applause and the three square meals a day...'

Too many of my babies became coats, so I decided to increase security...

"Well thank you, and may I say you look quite handsome too..."

'Why can't you collect shells like the other kids?'

"It's not a moustache kiddo: It's nasal hair..."

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

"She said yes! She's the seal of approval!"

'SAME SOCKS BAR.'

"So far so good, Bill's reverse psychology was working: no contenders had challenged him..."

"That's his answer to everything!"

Official Seal

"You're overprotective. Stop telling her not to go out on a limb."

A seal is riding atop a great white shark!

Save our seals - "I doubt my little vote will make any difference."

"The cultural appropriation is annoying but the herring is delicious."

Seals on Wheels

'He runs a very successful hedge fund.'

'It's that bloody David Attenborough! It looks like one of us is about to die a gruesome, yet visually stunning death.'

"I thought you meant we had a security leak."

Eric knew where all the real slappers hang out.

'No matter how many times I beat these guys they still don't take me serious.'

"I take it back: You might look at bit clumsy on land, but boy you're amazingly agile in the water!"

"Do you think it's an accident of history that Freemasons live in houses and we live in trees?"

"Don't worry, I never get the jokes either, but if you clap your flippers, he'll throw you a fish..."

'Acorns or chocolate cake?'