Sea Stories Gifts

'Come out - you drunken old rat!'

Sailors eating a mermaid

Blast it, Neptune. Do you have to track water in every time?!

Newly amputated arm points to captain Hooks' cabin.

Pirates force captive to walk plank as their ship is devoured by whale.

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

The one that got away

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

Fishing with God

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

'Son, I told you before: If you circle your prey for too long, you get dizzy...'

Scuba: 'You call that a knot, now this is a knot.'

"Call me, Ishmael."

"How much did it cost to have your ears pierced?"

'It was this big. I swear'

Two Men Angler's In A Storm.

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

"He's a keeper!"

'Ships plumber reporting for duty.'

"Now you're just being a jerk!"

'Fear of getting caught is understandable but fear of water, I think, requires counselling.'

Angler poses with mermaid catch.

'I win!'

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

'It's grossed over a billion dollars. Let's go see the Titanic wreck.'

'To think we used to complain about a little flotsam and jetsam.'

A fish swimming with an umbrella.

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

A crab finds an alternative to walking sideways.

Lighthouse attracts ships like moths

'Lucas A Non Lucendo.'