Sea Monkey Trainer Gifts

'Sherman, I think you're overfeeding your sea monkey!'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

Polly txt speak

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"Quick, start the car!"

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

Facts of life - The birds and the dogs.

"I think therefore I am." "Bow Wow, Bow Wow, Bow Wow."

"Hey Lady this is a sixty zone!"

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

'Bert's dog training.'

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

Litter Tray Training

"Is that true, Charles? You leave your crap all over the house?"

'He's not supposed to go out.'

"How long is it since you took Benji for a walk?"

"You can stop pulling, you knucklehead—I took your leash off ten minutes ago."

'Other dogs howl at the moon, I've trained mine to play Bach.'

"I wasn't howling at the moon. I was singing along to my iPod."

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"Don't even think about it."

"Let's break the record for non-stop deranged barking."

Ezekiel and his Dog: "Have you been in the valley of dry bones again?"

'Listen Sonny, I don't want or NEED to get to the other side!'

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

"If he tries to dip, Mrs. Callister, you mustn't hesitate to use the choke chain."

"Settle down boy, they're not actual cat-fish."

Dog stretching before a walk.

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

''Junk Yard Dog' just sounds so much cooler.'

'I suppose an explanation is in order?'