Scroll Scholar Gifts

Romans.

"I'm charging you with texting and driving."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

'Scroll down for the good stuff!'

Wikipedia...

"Have you been working out?"

"Must be another paradigm shift."

"Nice, but as long as there are readers there will be scrolls."

'Read that last part back to me.'

"There's the pressure from my public, naturally, as well as the pressure from my publisher, my agent, and all that. But the real pressure comes from that devil inside that makes me different from other men, that makes me a writer. But, of course, you know all about pressure, grinding out those papers at Sarah Lawrence."

"Fifty years in academia, studying, researching, writing and teaching. And what do they call me? ‘The Human AI’."

'Thirty years in academia and all I got was this chair.'

"He's so into social media that he's become anti-social."

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

Eugene Ionesco

Petrarch

"Mr Newton, we have carefully reviewed your work in alchemy and have come to one conclusion: stick to physics.'

"If history has taught us anything, it's taught us that there have been a ridiculous number of books written about history."

95 Theses That Will Blow Your Mind!

"What does it all mean?"

Lowbrow Lolita

''Et cetera' implies that you know much more than you really do. . .'

The What's-The-Hurry? Institute

"Question authority"

The dead sea scrolls

Francois Rabelais

"You might have time left for one more book, but only if it doesn't require and lot of research."

Brain Power