Screen Time Enthusiast Gifts

"C'mon, time to get up and stare at your devices all day."

'You're right, it is too nice outside to play inside. Could you help me carry the TV and PlayStation out to the deck?'

'Why don't you put all that stuff away, and go watch some good old-fashioned TV?'

'It's hard to believe summer's already over. Seems like I just sat down in front of the TV.'

"It cost $699. But when you factor in the time wasted sitting in front of it, well, the real cost is enormous."

"Its's a beautiful day. Why don't you play outside?"

'Talk about punishment. Last night I wasn't allowed to use my laptop and phone while watching TV.'

'I posted a bedtime story on your homepage. Enjoy and good night!'

"Go out and play? What is this, 1962?"

"This is not what I meant when I said you kids could have more screen time!"

'Let's buy the one that has the game on it.'

'You've heard of a couch potato? Well he's a mouse potato.'

Watching TV on the side.

"I want something that will really wow her should she happen to look up from her phone."

"Yes, Megan, it's book. Think of each page as a screen."

"We interrupt this program to bring you a special message from your teachers..."

"What do you mean I have to be more active? Today I visited websites on swimming, biking and climbing."

Trying to get kids into sports

Cable Hell.

"But you told me to go out and get some fresh air!" (Kid has taken the TV outside.)

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

'Maybe your computer is flipping into sleep mode is because it's 1:30 in the morning and time to go to bed.'

'Scroll down, no sorry, scroll up...OK now scroll down again...'

'I caught him watching tv, surfing the net, and playing video games ..book him!'

Child plugged into TV

"Help! Help! My phone is dying!"

"No, I don't play. I just watch people play on the internet."

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

Screen Addicted Snowman in the Path of a Plough

"Wow, it's only eleven – that still leaves time for me to ruin tomorrow by staying up doing nothing on the Internet."

You.com

"I don't know which needs charged more, him or all the devices he was on all summer."

"Yes, the remote has grown into dad's hand, but that isn't the problem, doctor. We need to change the remote's batteries."

"A new government survey has suggested that living along and watching too much tv can make some people very angry."

"Oh yes, it's been wonderful that with all this time off school he's been able to enjoy the outdoors, do lots of activities, spend quality time with the family..."