Screen Skeptics Pillows

'All I did was touch the screen here, and it called me a misanthrope.'

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

"People of Earth – can everyone see my screen?"

'No, that doesn't make any difference either, Miss Jones.'

"You wanted to miss the Matisse show."

Bad Influence of TV

"Dad, can you read?"

"The news you are about to see is fictitious and is shown merely for its sensational content."

'This is Thompson, he'll be getting your tea department online and working on it's global brand.'

Rare Book Store: Telephone Directories

"Please, no more movies about feelings."

"Two directors, three adaptations plus 3-D, and they STILL screw it up!"

"Smartphone sales" "Degradation of society"

"I miss expense accounts."

"It's the only way I can get some of my patience to listen to me!"

Missing the score on a split-screen TV

"What are you doing?"

"Is there a discount for someone who doesn't want to see the movie?"

'Baldo, being on TV requires talent.'

'…dial tone…dial tone…dial tone…'

'We'd like to return it. There wasn't any on-screen chemistry between us.'

"I'm not a fan of biblical movies."

'The doctor from 'daytime television' said I've got gall stones, but I thought I'd better come to you for a second opinion.'

"It means this show has been dumbed down to the level of people who couldn't pour water out of a boot, even if the instructions were printed on the heel."

Numb and Number.

'We spend a fortune on a big screen and he watches everything on his phone!'

"We can now tell the rest of the mice that after testing on lab humans, phones can be an addictive time waster."

"I pushed the learn button on the remote and that book popped up on the screen!"

Permanent Annoying Logo TV.

Show down between woman and weighing machine.

'The number of people who, like me, don't trust the media anymore is steadily rising...'